


in defense of poppytwt

by Anonymous



Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: All of this is just Mentioned, Grooming, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Other, Pedophilia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-04
Updated: 2021-01-04
Packaged: 2021-03-15 00:49:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,302
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28554924
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: an essay, helping to display our perspective of why we do what we do.
Relationships: Toby Smith | Tubbo/TommyInnit, Wilbur Soot/TommyInnit
Comments: 42
Kudos: 218
Collections: Anonymous





	in defense of poppytwt

**Author's Note:**

> i fixed it from the original formatting of the hastebin that this was from, but the site was being too finicky, so I posted it here instead. note there are mentions of grooming, rape, pedophilia, and other associated.

hello to the reader, i am a member of the poppytwt community, aka, problematic mcyt.

we are the people that everyone warned you about. of course, it trended on twitter once. granted, it was the  #nsfwmcyt tag that trended, but we tend to be grouped under that umbrella. just know that before i start,  **problematic mcyt** (who i will be referring to as “ **poppy** ” or “ **poppytwt** ” for the rest of this) is  _ separate from nsfwmcyt _ . nsfwmcyt does, indeed, sexualize ccs, but only adult ccs who have consented to sexualization. they are not the ones that condone the creation of underage nsfw content, pedophilic content, and others. so ultimately, they are not the ones i am writing for, and not the ones you should be attacking if you are under the complaint of underage ccs being sexualized. they have their reasons for what they do. but i don’t know what that is. so i will be exclusively talking about us.

poppytwt.

and, of course, i am in no way the perspective that everyone has in the community, I am but one person. but this is my own take, so take it as you will. 

trauma is  _ no fun occurrence _ , and over time, either we realize it or not, it can rewire the brain. it starts to make us start to dislike things we used to enjoy, and, sometimes, the opposite occurrence happens; it makes them enjoy things they previously disliked.

all these antis act as if we, people part of this community, WANT to be this way. that we WANT to be in this mindset. but our minds, either it is from sexual trauma, or just any type of exposure to a groomer, or suspicious behavior at a young age that desensitized you to that type of material at a young age, or something as simple as your parents not being responsible enough to guard you against the internet and nsfw at a young age and causing you to introduce sexual feelings that your body can't process quite yet. (and as much as you may  _ think  _ it's your fault; if you're under the age of 12 and you find out about porn, your parents have failed in protecting you.)

all these factors, and even more scenarios I haven't mentioned, can affect someone, and cause them to bottle up hypersexual emotions at a young age. causing them to become desensitized to such emotions as the urge to explore their developing body at an earlier age, or the urges to pursue a sexual relationship with someone of their age, or older. 

of course, we understand liking other teens, they are withing our age range, and according to law. we are the group of people that are allowed to feel sexual emotions towards these minors (but mostly, tommy and tubbo, being 16 and 17 at time of writing this.). we are taught to like people our age, so it’s almost confusing whenever people confront us telling us that we are “pedophiles” for liking people of the same age. 

because as much as outsiders like to distort our beliefs, we actually tend to mostly leave people in poppy who are above 18 alone, because even some of  _ us  _ think that is it  **kind of weird** to be in a problematic space sexualizing minors as an adult, even if fictional. 

but... why older? you may think; you've been taught that pursuing relations with people who are older is wrong all through life, lessons taught in school to stay away from strangers? stay away from creepy adults who want to take advantage of you? either it is an 18-year-old or a 25-year-old, or even older than that. some people who have been through these emotions WANT to pursue sensual scenarios and sexual interactions in their heads with the people that put on such a nice face online.

this is where we come in.

we've seen how nice wilbur is, or tommy, tubbo, techno, or philza, how ideal they fit a narrative. because most commonly, when we go through such a mental rewiring. we are, to a certain extent, AWARE that our own guardians have failed us. so when we get introduced to the manipulative strings of a sexual relationship, and with the romantic attributes that come along with it. we latch onto those people that we see with such charismatic personalities. that have comforted us, made us feel happy. in the long run, it is not real love. but what else are we supposed to process it as, when our own adults have failed us? our brains latch onto them, ultimately, because that's all we've GOT. or, that's what our brains tell us. 

and from this, it proves a certain theory: teens are susceptible to manipulation, even indirect ones. the type of manipulation that is literal self-manipulation, mind games that mind rewiring can play on the victim. the ones who have been through something, not necessarily traumatizing, but through something that has exposed them to the sexual nature of their brain. and like every minor, they are the most curious. as they are still developing members of society, and want to learn about as much as they can. and through our lives, we are shown this through either real-life scenarios, like documentaries, photos, videos, or personal experience.

or through the realm of Fiction. the magical place where anything can happen at the flick of a wrist, the stroke of a keyboard. an entire story can be told with no actors, only your imagination. a completely free, versatile form of self-expression where nobody can get hurt from it. and it's not reality, it's the magical, false, and free world of fiction. where you are the only person that has control, and nobody else.

you cant control reality, you  _ can't  _ control what goes on, or what happens to you. you  _ cant  _ reverse yourself seeing sexual things or being forced upon someone with the wrong mindset, or whatever else. you can't control those situations because you, there, are the lesser power. things happen to us and we have no way of being able to reverse it or change it in some way. which can make us wallow. or feel empty. but we are taught, through our  **entire lives** , that fiction is  _ escapism _ . a place where a person can go where  _ we  _ are the storyteller,  _ we  _ are the god,  _ we  _ depict how every single thought and action goes. it is all under our control. which is what makes the art of a story, either it is a story through a picture, or writing, or a sculpture, our own.

we use the outlet of fiction to depict these scenarios of different people getting together and engaging in the sexual feelings that erode in our minds as we explore more, because that's what always  _ happens _ . when you learn about something that fascinates you, you want to learn more, and  _ more _ , and go deeper, to find every part of it. even the bad. which is where some of the gorey and non-consensual stuff appears.

despite the image that these want to paint us, we would NEVER wish for these occurrences to actually happen to the people we write about. the horrendous acts of grooming, rape, and other such. we genuinely care about the people that we write about, and despite these things being terrible in nature, it's using the people that our brain registers as people we care about, people we trust, and love. love enough to know they wouldn't be angry at us for just simply coping. our brain KNOWS that they are not actually hurting and that it isn't real. so it's alright.

using these people that we know and care about can help us by setting a baseline via people we care about, setting a storyline. because in some scenarios, we cannot see ourselves appealing in that, so we use their friends and in some occurrences, their family. so yes, we get sexual pleasure from writing our favorite content creators. but it is not us to blame. we cannot help that, through some experience as a child, or adolescent has caused our brains to register different types of pleasure.

the reality is that fiction is one of the healthiest courses of action for us. because if we did not have these people that we cared enough about to trust with handling our deepest, darkest fantasies. then where would we go? if you were thinking something along the lines of "contacting actual people, real adults, which can put the minor in real danger, and traumatize them further." then you're right. it is such an important factor to realize that you may think that fiction being written of the people you care about is bad. but there are a lot worse consequences for the writer/artist if they were to go out and actually get groomed just to fulfill a desire that their brain wants.

another argument I see around is; "well, why don't you keep it in your personal spaces? locked away?" 

_ believe me, _ **WE TRY TO!!!**

here's another struggle, yes, we may not do it under complete disclosure like discord or other messaging apps. BUT we try our damn best to keep our content out of the public eye for a  _ REASON _ . we keep our entire community locked down for a  _ REASON!! _ we only use certain a03 tags for a  _ REASON!! _ we try not to go out in public and make our community known for a  _ REASON!!!!!! _ but people out there have such malicious intent, they will weave into our community and gain our trust by making writing and being nice, when they're actually a spy. which is kinda fucked up to be spying on a group mainly consisted of  **minors** .

the reality is that; we do not want to see any of the relationships that our favorite CCs have to get destroyed!!! as said before, we  _ GENUINELY  _ care about these people!!! to outsiders, it really doesn't seem it. but the fact is is that we trust these people enough to handle the darkest fantasies in our own, private community. but it isn't even US that makes it a big deal. it was never us,  **poppytwt** , that got it trending, it was the people  **COMPLAINING** . literally counteracting their own propaganda by making CCs aware of what we were doing when we didn't WANT them to know, and they were just shoving it into their faces, shouting "LOOK HOW UGLY IT IS!!" making the CC they swore to protect LITERALLY UNCOMFORTABLE. we are just as uncomfortable about being put on blast upon hundreds of thousands of people about what we do as the CC is about nsfw being made about them. and i'm sorry we break boundaries, but the people WITH a large following and lust for justice is the REASON that poppy gets more attention, and grows in size because they continue to introduce MORE people to be aware of us.

and despite what it may seem. we REALLY do not care for big numbers. some of us dislike that our small and dedicated community is now getting bombarded with new people and spies, and since we  _ can’t  _ determine who is who, we just have to deny EVERYONE. which is why people from august-september (2020) stick to themselves, while anyone who joined in october and later just get mostly pushed away. we don't know who to trust. and we're so sick of being spied, picked apart, doxed, and exposed when most of us are LITERALLY MINORS. 

and, if I am to be honest. I am  _ happy  _ that people do not have to deal with what we have to deal with. because for some. they hate being this way. being "hyper fixated" isn't a joke. some people feel as if they are trapped in this because it is the only thing that gives them any type of emotional, sexual reaction anymore. or the only thing that they have control over in their life anymore. so they keep doing it, and we are constantly reminded by outsiders that we are hated and we are monsters for what we do, despite them not understanding. and that, stacked upon the awful emotions that we already feel to varying extents. 

we are told to just _ "go to therapy" _ , but for us, some of us dont have access to this. due to not wanting to tell our parental figures, or for costing, or for any other inconvenience. for some of us, this is the therapy we need, and for some, this is all they’ve  _ got _ . not saying that writing problematic fiction works for  _ every single victim _ of this mental rewiring, there have been a fair share of people who have tried it out, but ultimately felt worse, so they've left writing such fiction behind to go pursue other options.

but of course, if you aren't a victim of this type of mental rewiring. you would not understand, because you can't understand. this applies to really, any other type of mental illness, where people outside of the affected can never truly understand the coping that has to occur in order to heal. and writing problematic fanfic is just another one of those outlets.

i hope that, whoever sees this, if I ever decided to let this perspective out, that it at the very  _ LEAST  _ helped someone understand why we do what we do. we understand that it is morally wrong, but we can't help it. we write these things because it helps us. and with the world of fiction, we can spill out all these fantasies into a place where there are no consequences. it is so, SO much better than just stalking the creator to oblivion and being creepy.

i hope with this, I managed to open the eyes of someone with this. even if it’s one, singular person.

**Author's Note:**

> i know ultimately, i will have missed out on something important. but that is okay, I have tried my best to word this in the best way I can.
> 
> feel free to absolutely let all your rebuttals, opinions and such below. i will not be censoring people. i am only leaving comment moderation on so that people can feel free to ramble. i wont post it publically unless you give me the go.
> 
> but god are my notifications going to be dead once this goes out.


End file.
